Allah, How do I Love You?

 I was doing my Lail when suddenly remembered these verses and started to weep:

كَمَثَلِ ٱلشَّيۡطَـٰنِ إِذۡ قَالَ لِلۡإِنسَـٰنِ ٱڪۡفُرۡ فَلَمَّا كَفَرَ قَالَ إِنِّى بَرِىٓءٌ۬ مِّنكَ إِنِّىٓ أَخَافُ ٱللَّهَ رَبَّ ٱلۡعَـٰلَمِينَ (١٦) فَكَانَ عَـٰقِبَتَہُمَآ أَنَّہُمَا فِى ٱلنَّارِ خَـٰلِدَيۡنِ فِيہَا‌ۚ وَذَٲلِكَ جَزَٲٓؤُاْ ٱلظَّـٰلِمِينَ (١٧) يَـٰٓأَيُّہَا ٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُواْ ٱتَّقُواْ ٱللَّهَ وَلۡتَنظُرۡ نَفۡسٌ۬ مَّا قَدَّمَتۡ لِغَدٍ۬‌ۖ وَٱتَّقُواْ ٱللَّهَ‌ۚ إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ خَبِيرُۢ بِمَا تَعۡمَلُونَ (١٨) وَلَا تَكُونُواْ كَٱلَّذِينَ نَسُواْ ٱللَّهَ فَأَنسَٮٰهُمۡ أَنفُسَہُمۡ‌ۚ أُوْلَـٰٓٮِٕكَ هُمُ ٱلۡفَـٰسِقُونَ (١٩) لَا يَسۡتَوِىٓ أَصۡحَـٰبُ ٱلنَّارِ وَأَصۡحَـٰبُ ٱلۡجَنَّةِ‌ۚ أَصۡحَـٰبُ ٱلۡجَنَّةِ هُمُ ٱلۡفَآٮِٕزُونَ (٢٠) لَوۡ أَنزَلۡنَا هَـٰذَا ٱلۡقُرۡءَانَ عَلَىٰ جَبَلٍ۬ لَّرَأَيۡتَهُ ۥ خَـٰشِعً۬ا مُّتَصَدِّعً۬ا مِّنۡ خَشۡيَةِ ٱللَّهِ‌ۚ وَتِلۡكَ ٱلۡأَمۡثَـٰلُ نَضۡرِبُہَا لِلنَّاسِ لَعَلَّهُمۡ يَتَفَكَّرُونَ (٢١) هُوَ ٱللَّهُ ٱلَّذِى لَآ إِلَـٰهَ إِلَّا هُوَ‌ۖ عَـٰلِمُ ٱلۡغَيۡبِ وَٱلشَّهَـٰدَةِ‌ۖ هُوَ ٱلرَّحۡمَـٰنُ ٱلرَّحِيمُ (٢٢) هُوَ ٱللَّهُ ٱلَّذِى لَآ إِلَـٰهَ إِلَّا هُوَ ٱلۡمَلِكُ ٱلۡقُدُّوسُ ٱلسَّلَـٰمُ ٱلۡمُؤۡمِنُ ٱلۡمُهَيۡمِنُ ٱلۡعَزِيزُ ٱلۡجَبَّارُ ٱلۡمُتَڪَبِّرُ‌ۚ سُبۡحَـٰنَ ٱللَّهِ عَمَّا يُشۡرِڪُونَ (٢٣) هُوَ ٱللَّهُ ٱلۡخَـٰلِقُ ٱلۡبَارِئُ ٱلۡمُصَوِّرُ‌ۖ لَهُ ٱلۡأَسۡمَآءُ ٱلۡحُسۡنَىٰ‌ۚ يُسَبِّحُ لَهُ ۥ مَا فِى ٱلسَّمَـٰوَٲتِ وَٱلۡأَرۡضِ‌ۖ وَهُوَ ٱلۡعَزِيزُ ٱلۡحَكِيمُ (٢٤)

The meaning:

(And the hypocrites are) on the likeness of the devil when he telleth man to disbelieve, then, when he disbelieveth saith: Lo! I am quit of thee. Lo! I fear Allah, the Lord of the Worlds. (16) And the consequence for both will be that they are in the Fire, therein abiding. Such is the reward of evil-doers. (17) O ye who believe! Observe your duty to Allah. And let every soul look to that which it sendeth on before for the morrow. And observe your duty to Allah. Lo! Allah is Aware of what ye do. (18) And be not ye as those who forgot Allah, therefor He caused them to forget their souls. Such are the evil-doers. (19) Not equal are the owners of the Fire and the owners of the Garden. The owners of the Garden, they are the victorious. (20) If We had caused this Qur'an to descend upon a mountain, thou (O Muhammad) verily hadst seen it humbled, rent asunder by the fear of Allah. Such similitudes coin We for mankind that haply they may reflect. (21) He is Allah, than Whom there is no other God, the Knower of the Invisible and the Visible. He is the Beneficent, Merciful. (22) He is Allah, than Whom there is no other God, the Sovereign Lord, the Holy One, Peace, the Keeper of Faith, the Guardian, the Majestic, the Compeller, the Superb. Glorified be Allah from all that they ascribe as partner (unto Him). (23) He is Allah, the Creator, the Shaper out of naught, the Fashioner. His are the most beautiful names. All that is in the heavens and the earth glorifieth Him, and He is the Mighty, the Wise. (24)

It was the meaning that made me weep. Thinking about how incredible the devil is. He convinced me so that I could spend hours to think of her while I couldn't spend an hour to think of Allah. I remember her during day and night but I am not able to remember Allah besides the praying time. I could spend money to call her without any hesitation but when it came to infaq, I always think not to give too much money. And there are many things I could do for anyone but not for Allah. Although I already knew that in the end of the day, when all of the deeds are counted, the devil said that he is irresponsible of what I have done. That's why during this holy month, it is my aim to clean my heart as well as my mind. Hence I don't have to bother myself to look for the way how to love Allah. O God, please give me strength to go through this!